27 November 2006

Lindsay Lo'Am What She Am

Well, Robert Altman's dead and Lindsay Lohan says her "Prairie Home Companion" director was like a father--"Poopdeck Pappy", one assumes, to her "Swee'pea"?--given her unique spelling/pronunskiation of the term "adequate" in her rambling, Joyceian "official" eulogy to the late filmmaker published in this week's "People" magazine of all things (which last I looked was run by people for the kind of people who would probably think the "Nashville" icon was the guy who ran Scott's Chicken Villa). Could she really be that stupid or infinkile (you'd think she'd have a spell check on that Crackberry...)?

All I can think of is that we've been had...(more times than she's been in the Viper Room). Like Sasha Baron Cohen and Andy Kaufman before him, while no one's been paying attention LL's refashioned herself post-"Mean Girls" as a deconstructionist prankster and one day will respond to all of her bad press with a cultural indictment the likes of which hasn't been seen since Allan Bloom's "Closing Of The American Mind".

The alternative is just too depressing to consider...